#if jessica has no haters i am dead

[earthshells]

i think "you bene gesserit made me a freak" wasn't enough if i were paul i would've done worse. imagine your son justifiably freaking out after being presented with visions of a possible future and begging for help and your only response is like yassss you are the son of the duke leto atreides

[thatcatangelwriter]

I think after her time at the spider society gwen can be very creepy at times, but like doesn't realize it or register it well.

Like she's gwen stacy. The cursed lover. The doomed girl. She is the face of thousands of corpses. The face of thousands of what ifs. A bittersweet dream. A constant longing.

Most of the time when people look at her they don't see her they see someone else. Her simply existing turns the entire society into a haunted house. She's a ghost, she's better off invisible and while I don't think it's intentional she gets pushed to the side a lot by most people I think Miguel, Jess and Peter might be the exception in this concept but even then its gets complicated due to her connection with Miles and eventually this kinda starts rubbing off in an unsettling way.

Gwen is implied to be very high ranking in the society. Jess calls her "her star pupil" and Lyla warned Gwen about the spot before Hobie and Pavitr. And Miguel's "You knew better, Gwen !" She justs seems to be a part of Miguel's gang of higher ups with Peter B and Jess and all that and considering the fact that she's been there for just a few months that's saying something.

I think Gwen took a lot of training and missions to prove herself, and maybe Miguel sent her on more missions to distract her from Miles and stuff. Hell he might have trained her along with Jessica at times which considering how stern they can be I wouldn't be suprised if this rubbed off on gwen who didn't really have anyone else besides Peter and Hobie. Like she has been Spider Woman more than gwen stacy at this point.

Speaking of Spider Woman, I think it's a good time to bring up how gwen's mental state gets fucked up around her identity as a superhero and how it plays into my idea of her being creepy thing. Because like Spider Woman is litteraly considered a murderer in her dimension and isn't very liked. And while yes its true that in most universes Spider Man has its haters. It's way worse in Gwen's dimension like in the comics she gets shocked when people thank her kinda bad. She has supporters but sadly the people who call her a monster are the most vocal. Like even her dad saw Spider Woman that way and even after finding out who she was still pulled a gun at her face so yeah.

Gwen already blames herself for Peter's death and general public opinion doesn't really help with leaving that guilt behind. She internalizes those things. So I think that do her deep internal feelings Gwen might be at times more ruthless and violent than your typical spider hero which can already be shocking especially in contrast to how graceful she can be as spider woman . I don't think she wants to be. But i think its just the internal intrusive thought "No matter what I do I am a monster why pull back ?" And with her whole canon event I think she might be prone to being reckless and throwing herself at danger and being the one to make the biggest sacrifice because hey she is already fated to die.

So yeah I think that at times when the stakes are high Gwen is one of the scariest spiders when she snaps. Like the treatment she received and internalized kinda jumps out and its not pretty at all. And even just in context of her not being in a mission i still think she can be cryptid looking because she kinda acts like she's invisible and just avoids being noticed due to all the peters around.

Like just imagine her beat up with a broken mask and all you see are her cold eyes and its weird because its almost like you have a dead person staring at you and in some ways that's exactly what it is. Or her accidentally scaring people because she's so quiet that they don't see her coming.

Just her looking like a dead girl walking and yeah maybe in a way she is but...it just looks to real and unsettling.

One last thing about this, Miles notices and hates every second of it. In fact I think all of her close friends hate it.

[letojessica]

i dont know if you're still doing these but!!! how about what's your fave of the dune movies? also a character you grew to love in dune? and last ill stop i promise. your anti pairing in shadow and bone? 👀 love you mwah!! 🫶🏻💌

help dw bestie i am always doing these heheh lyt!! <3

fave of dune movies: bestie i literally have a canon url… but yeah it has to be jessica atreides like cmon. find me another girlie who changes the tapestry of the universe forever all in the name of love and grief with iconic lines who never stops serving looks and cunt i dare you. she’s been so special to me and ngl her and the community i found through her kept me alive ahahha. i see so much of myself in her and i really hope i mature like her sans the culty bits jdjsksksk

a character i grew to love from the dune movies: can’t choose between chani and irulan so i’ll just go with the both of them lol. they both resonate with me so much like i love the tenacity that chani has and the intellectualism of irulan and knowing how the story goes i’m so seated to watch them in messiah. the theatre employees better be scared rn

anti pairing from s&b: …might be a little controversial but i hate darklina i’m sorry not sorryyyy. if the darkling has no haters i am dead because look at how he treats the grisha man. he’s an abuser and an enabler and just not a match for anyone and especially not alina. argghhhh.

[mittensmorgul]

I'm still having a hard time understanding your definition of "canon relationship". Endgame material? Essentially happy? Featured in many episodes? I think most people simply consider "canon" = "it happened in the show/book/film". And Sam and Eileen have canonically had feeling for each other, on screen. What those feelings were and how much they may have been manipulated by Chuck, neither seems sure, but it doesn't make them any less of a thing that noticeably happened. Therefore canon.

When you need a semantic debate to somehow validate your favored ship, and you feel the need to debate semantics with a stranger on the internet in order to “win” and be proven “correct” in some way, we’ve all lost, friendo.

You’re absolutely right, with your definition of “canon.” It’s what has actually happened, in the case of Supernatural, on screen in the show itself. That’s not up for debate. You’re trying to introduce a strawman into this conversation.

I’m attempting to define, from a watsonian perspective, which means from WITHIN THE NARRATIVE, how the CHARACTERS THEMSELVES would describe their relationship. You’re giving me the doylist perspective, from outside the narrative, the fact that Sam and Eileen have a relationship of any kind-- romantic or otherwise-- in canon.

You’re attempting to conflate the two things, for the sake of winning an argument on the internet.

By your definition, Dean and Cas are canon, too. Which, I mean... they are, but that’s not the debate here, and it adds nothing to the fact that Eileen herself, in canon, has stated that she doesn’t feel her relationship with Sam is even real.

Yes, it happened in canon, but that’s not the whole story, either.

I mean, let’s use a completely non-shippy example here, to hopefully illustrate why “but they’re canon! it happened in canon!” is... an entirely irrelevant point in context. Let’s look at a canonical friendship to illustrate the point.

Canonically, Garth has tried to kill Sam. That happened, in canon. Garth wolfed out and attacked Sam. Sounds awful, right? Should we lose all sympathy for Garth? Should we believe that he did that of his own free will, and is an “evil” character now, because that very much did happen in canon? Or are we supposed to use our brains and understand that Garth literally did not have a choice, because he was acting under a form of mind control, being puppeted by Michael into attacking Sam? Are we supposed to have a better understanding of what actually happened in context, and correctly see this as “Michael tried to use a trusted character to harm Sam, playing on their preexisting friendship/relationship in order to lure Sam in to his trap, and using Sam’s trust and friendship with that character to harm him?”

Mary has canonically tried to kill Sam and Dean (in 12.03). Are we to assume that she obviously hates them and wanted them dead? Because canonically her actions would say we should! She tried to hurt them! Oh, but... she was possessed by a ghost, and wasn’t in control of her own actions... maybe we actually need to think about what that means... maybe Mary herself doesn’t actually want to kill her own sons...

Or if you’re a Mary hater and are willing to think the worst of her, how about the canonical fact that Dean has tried to kill Sam. That Dean has canonically told Sam that he wished he were dead? There you have it, Dean canonically has said “your life sucked the life out of my life” to him. Dean canonically rejected any sort of care for Sam. Are we supposed to take that at face value, just because it happened in canon? Or are we supposed to understand that Dean was a demon, and Honestly. >.>

Cas canonically kissed Meg that one time. Obviously they’re canon, right? What, they’re not? Oh, right, Dean even lampshaded the fact with the “give you an hour with Meg first” comment, to which Cas replied “Why would I want that?” Does a kiss make a couple “canon?” What does that even mean? “going canon” is a practically useless term in cases like that. The goalposts for what any one person would consider qualifies a romantic couple as “canon” are eternally shifting all over the field.

Let’s be better than that, and instead understand that we’re all talking about our individual interpretations of the same canon. We’re just seeing different things, because we are different people with different experiences and understandings of the characters and the overarching narrative.

I have repeatedly explained my understanding of Sam and Eileen’s relationship as canon itself has defined it. I have explained that my understanding of the relationship they had, offscreen and undefined by canon, between 11.11 and 12.17 has shifted dramatically since Eileen’s return in 15.06. I had, before this season, been willing to HEADCANON that Sam and Eileen could’ve had an established offscreen relationship based on the nature of their relationship we saw onscreen in 12.17. It was cute! It was exciting thinking that Sam had grown so close to someone!

It was... proven in s15 that the offscreen relationship we’d all headcanoned in s12 was... nothing more than a happy headcanon, and had not actually happened! THAT is what I mean when I have talked about what is ~not~ canon about their relationship. Let’s be very clear about that, because 

(gif source)

So, the debate over what is canon or what is not canon, to me personally, is an entirely useless conversation. Dean canonically hates chick flick movies. Also, he canonically loves chick flick movies. Sam canonically does not like bacon (15.06), and yet he canonically made a huge pile of bacon with Eileen in 15.07, but then was back to eating salad by the next episode. You can point at a lot of things that are “canon” to try and prove your point. To whatever end, or for whatever motive you may have in attempting to do so. That’s called “cherry picking.” (pay special attention to the section on Confirmation Bias) You have to be aware of what exactly canon is showing us as a whole, though, for it to have any actual meaning. 

At this point, after 15.09, Eileen has canonically chosen not to pursue a relationship with Sam, after she was canonically manipulated by an outside force into attempting to pursue a relationship with Sam.

She could, in canon, return to pursue a relationship with Sam! I am not here to speculate on that! It could happen! But it would be based in their canonical history, that is almost entirely muddied by Chuck’s interference in their relationship to this point. That is literal, actual canon!

But they had a cute relationship in 12.17! Chuck didn’t make them do that!

I have not denied that! That is obvious! But I’m not going to ignore everything that happened in s15 that has been (in canon! again!) defined as “not real.” As “not their own choice.” And I’m not going to suggest we just handwave the canonical fact that Eileen feels used, feels violated, by how Chuck attempted to manipulate her into seducing Sam, despite their canonical past interactions.

I mean, Sam carried out a two season canonical romance arc with Ruby. Their relationship is canon. He canonically had feelings for her, trusted her, fully engaged in the relationship with her. That’s not up for debate, but the in-canon CONTEXT of their relationship was a lie, you know? She lied to him for two years, with a specific goal in doing so. She manipulated him into all of that to free Lucifer from the cage. The fact that their relationship is canon is entirely irrelevant to any ANALYSIS of said relationship, and understanding it in context, and what it means for the characters.

So when you apply the context to Sam and Eileen’s relationship as it stands in s15, the fact it ~exists~ isn’t up for debate. The fact that they canonically interacted in a flirtatious fashion on screen, the fact they did anything together on screen isn’t up for debate. The reason WHY Eileen engaged in any of this, though, is also not up for debate. Chuck made it all happen, from the moment her ghost appeared in the bunker to the moment she told Sam she needed to leave, all of that is under a pall of Chuck’s influence. That... is also canon.

So anon, what do YOU mean when you say “they’re canon.” Do you mean they have established a mutually consensual romantic relationship? (because if so, then they are NOT canon) Do you mean “they have interacted in a way that can be interpreted as insinuating there is romantic interest between them?” Because I could give you that one. They definitely have potential in the future. Do you mean “They kissed on screen!” Because heck, what does that even mean?

Sam’s canonically kissed a lot of people! Jessica Moore! Lori Sorenson! Sarah Blake! Jo (well, he was possessed by Meg at the time, so does this one count? Their mouths touched...)! Madison the werewolf! Ruby! Amelia Richardson! Dr. Roberts! Amy Pond! Becky (though he was under a love spell for that one, so does that count? from how skeeved the entire fandom has always been by that one... even if Becky thought they had real feelings for each other “deep down,” does anyone think Sam actually consented to any of that?)! Annie Hawkins (self-reported by Sam, and we take his word for it)! That woman who propositioned his body while he’d been body swapped with Gary, so does that even count because only Sam’s body was used there? or did they even actually do anything beyond tying Sam’s body occupied by Gary to a bed and getting out the flail...)! And if we’re going meta, then Genevieve Padalecki in the French Mistake!universe! That hippie chick soulless sam had sex with when Dean was abducted by “aliens” that one time! and speaking of soulless sam, the hooker he was with in 6.03, and the apparent string of women he was with that we only learned about tangentially via 6.13!

Does that mean Sam has a canonical relationship with all of these women? YES. But... like... you can’t look at this list (which is probably not even complete) and suggest that all of these relationships are of equal canonical import, or that they are equivalent in emotional weight for Sam as a character. That’s... idiotic, frankly.

So, to me, the discussion of “what is canon” is like... irrelevant to anything I’m actually here for. The actual understanding of what the canonical relationship MEANS and how it informs character is what is actually important to me.

So please stop trying to undercut an actual discussion of canon with a semantics strawman. Thanks.

[marirey17]

The Problem with Netflix Originals

I'm writing this post in regards to Sense 8 and the way Netflix has handled it. Sorry if you are tired of hearing about that issue but I do think it highlights what Netflix is doing with it's Originals shows. Take it as a warning.

Now I want to preface this by acknowledging there is a difference between a Netflix Original and it actually being Original. There are two types of Original Shows. The first a show that is funded by and aired on Netflix.  The second being a show that was original funded or aired on another network. I am also primarily going to be focused on first type of Netflix shows not their comedy specials, documentaries, children tv shows, or anime. Anyway on to the points I want to make.

Netflix currently has 35 shows that fall into that category. 16 of those shows are based of a previous work.  Be that a book, movie, comic, or previous show. That is ~43% of their current Original shows. For the other 19 shows, 6 were cancelled. The other 13 of those are a mixed bunch. You have a few like Master of None that we still aren't sure are going to get another season. Then a bunch of shows that have been renewed for a second season but we aren't sure are going to get another season after that. Before we get into what this all this means. Let's take a closer look at the shows based on previous material.

House of Cards -Based on a book

Hemlock Grove -based on a book

Orange Is the New Black – based on a book

A Series of Unfortunate Events -based on a book5. 13 Reasons Why – based on a book6. Daredevil -based on Marvel Comic books

Jessica Jones -based on Marvel Comic books

Luke Cage -based on Marvel Comic books

Iron Fist-based on Marvel Comic books

The Defenders-based on Marvel Comic books

Fuller House – Continuation of Full House

Haters Back Off -based of Miranda Sings YouTube

Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Return -Return of a previous show

Girlboss -based on a memoir book15. Dear White People -based on film of the same name16. The Crown - based on Queen Elizabeth life

A majority of the series above are the most well known or talked about Netflix Shows. With House of Cards and Orange is the New Black being flagship shows for Netflix Originals. And while the Marvel series might not be the 'best' shows on Netflix they still draw the audience who have read the comics or like the Marvel movies. 13 Reasons Why and Dear White People are both generating conversations arguments? about suicide and race. The point is that these shows draw in their original audience and hope they stay and talk about the show to others. It also looks like Netflix is moving more into creating shows that already have a fan base. i.e. The Castlevania show and the Death Note movie.

Alright so originals based on other properties are doing rather well. at least we think so cause Netflix doesn't release their inner rating system Originals that are truly original are rather hit or miss. We have had some great shows recently like Stranger Things. Shows that are both good shows and generates an online audience that talks about them. But recently we have had a several shows that have been cancelled. Bloodline, Get Down, and Sense8. All three shows are expensive to make. Bloodline cost ~7 to 8.5 million per episode. Get Down cost about $16 million per episode. Sense8 Season 2 cost $9 million per episode. But I would argue that the real reason why Sense8 and the others are cancelled is that they failed to get the online recognition or following that shows like Stranger Things or Master of None have.

TLDR: Netflix is leaving it subscribers who like their original content in a tricky place. Netflix is showing that it is more interested in shows that already have a built in audeince. With their business model that makes sense. Since a majority of their content are movies, and shows that are produced by someone else and you can watch them whenever you want! But that business model fails when dealing with Original Shows like Sense8. With ~43% of Original shows based on other properties, those shows grab traction from the audience member it already has. The Death Note Movie has not even been released and it is already being discussed in the Anime community. But shows like Sense8 that have no built in audience, Netflix needs to create/cultivate that audience. Especially when all episodes are binge able at once. One of the benefits for weekly shows is that they generate talk every week. Instead of a large spike if your lucky at the beginning of the release, a show might gather an audience eventually. But that audience will not generate as much talk in concentrated amounts. And with the streaming model of Netflix you know that the Netflix Original shows will most likely always be there but shows like Twin Peaks, Futurama, and Psych might not. Then Netflix loses potential fans for their original to shows that already have a reputation. So what does that mean for us if we are fans of an Original show like Sense8? It means that the fans have to promote their favorite show as much and urge others to watch it as soon as they can. Or the show might be cancelled. And those cancelled shows that have rough or bad endings will forever be on Netflix. They will slowly gain new fans who are casual Netflix users who don't realize that there new favorite show is dead.

[shirtlesssammy]

The Raid: Because it’s always nice to watch Sam Winchester save the day Recap

Then:

See you next season in 5 seasons!

Now:

We pick up right where we left off last week. Mary tries to explain her partnership with the BMoL. Sam wants to know how long she’s been working with them. She admits that the Brits brought her the Ramiel case. Dean’s response: “Cas almost died.” A hunter did die. Mary feels awful and admits that she lives with Wally’s death all the time. Dean’s response: “Good”.

Three Days Later

Mary and Mr. Ketch arrive at the Death Star the BMoL compound Moonbase, dressed all in black, clearly just finishing a mission. Mr. Ketch is still all heart eyes over their latest toy, the AVD, which seems to turn a room into a disco, and sends all sane creatures running for their lives --monsters included.

Once inside Ketch passes his overnight bag and barks out orders to Serena, a scientist with three PhDs. A nice reminder for us to not humanize this particular dashing monster. Mary stares forlornly at her phone. Dean hasn’t answered any of her texts. Mary thinks back to the bunker fight, and we all grab a giant box of tissues. Dean is so angry, and hurt. He lashes out. He makes some good points, but to be fair, so does Mary.

Dean: How about for once, you just try to be a mom.

Mary: I am your mother, but I am not just a mom. And you are not a child.

Dean: I never was.

I’m telling you, a nice beach vacation at the beginning of this season would have done wonders. Too bad the people Mary is currently working with had to go and kidnap her youngest son. Once again, I’m loving the Mary trajectory, but boy does it suck. And Dean calling his mother “Mary”, ouch. It was expected, but it sounds so odd coming out of Dean’s mouth.

Mr. Ketch catches up with Mick. Taking out vamp nests is so routine and boring for our handsome psychopath. “Boring is good,” affirms Mick. Yeah, enjoy those words now Mick. Mick also wonders where they are on recruiting Sam and Dean. Mr. Ketch doesn’t understand the bother, but Mick informs him that the “old men want them on board.”

Back at the bunker, Dean caught a case. Or not really, but is still really upset about Mary, and needs to hit something. Poor, even-tempered, bury it all inside and don’t even show the audience your pain Sam asks if Dean wants to talk about it. I love how Dean says “No”, but then jumps right into talking about it. He’s not ready to listen to reason though, and the second Sam hints at compromise, he jumps up in need of drinks, plural. I see Dean’s A+ coping mechanisms are in full effect. He tells Sam that his middle shtick isn’t working. “For once, pick a side,” he grumps before storming off screen.

That argument pushes Sam to meet with Mary. Mary tries, again, to apologize and explain what a world without monsters would be like. She throws out the whole Stanford thing --which seems a little manipulative. Sam left that world, and it took a long time, but he’s reconciled himself to being a hunter. I can only imagine that Sam does, in the back of his mind, late at night, think of Jessica and the life they had--and the life they should have had, but it’s all too late. He knows that any settling down he’ll do, it’ll be with another hunter. Even if monsters or the supernatural are gone from this world, there will still be something else that needs saving. It’s who he is. 

For Science:

Sam gets a tour of BMoL HQ, and gives Mick the cold shoulder. Mick lets it slip that they have a plan to exterminate every last vampire in America. Go on, Sam’s listening.

Dean comes back to an empty bunker, when there’s a knock at the door. It’s Dean’s Mystery Date: Mr. Ketch!

Mr. Ketch brought Scotch. Go on, Dean’s listening. (Natasha: Oh, Dean. You hapless alcoholic. ...Or swayed by Ketch’s suave good looks? Dean knows to look past a pretty face, right?)

At the briefing, Sam meets all the Red Shirts power players for this regional set-up for the BMoL. He learns that they’ve wiped out every vampire in the midwest except for one little nest. They’re all holed up in a hotel in Wichita. The AVD is locked and loaded.

At the hotel, the remaining vamps console each other over their fallen brethren, when in walks the Alpha Vamp! Long time, no see!

At the bunker, Dean and Mr. Ketch enjoy a ridiculously erotic round of drinks. 

Long pauses, long sips, shared inclinations. “You’re a killer, Dean Winchester.” That’s the second time this season that someone’s called Dean that! He is not like Mr. Ketch! His hunter code is nuanced, and he cares too much about people to be reduced to a mere killer. Anyway, Mr. Ketch’s seduction of Dean ends with “vamps” and Dean is hooked.  

At the Moonbase Pierce fanboys all over Sam. (You’re Sam Winchester? Squeeee!) Mick saunters up to Sam and asks him what he thinks of their satellite operation. Sam's impressed by Serena and Alton but he warns Mick about Pierce who “calls himself the Hunter King of Baton Rouge.” Mick confesses that, other than Mary, their hunter recruits are less than impressive.

Dean and Ketch, meanwhile, pull up to the hotel the vamps are holed up in ready to kick some fanged ass. Ketch attractively prepares a seriously deadly looking gun and then sees Dean's mess of a trunk. He likes the old fashioned machete Dean pulls out and begs a blade of his own (Boris: Ketch is very impressed with Dean’s blade, you could say). He wants a challenge. Then those two stone cold foxes killers head in to storm the vamp hideout. The hotel is empty, though. Dun dun DUN.

^^ Wherein Dean challenges Cas’s crown as Eyeroll Champion of the US^^

Back at Moonbase, Mary tells Sam that she invited him there so he can understand why Mary is working with the far more sophisticated BMoL. (<--sick burn: ours)  “So it wasn't a sales pitch?” Sam asks. “Because it was a good one.” Ooooo, Sammy. They saunter past security camera footage displayed on a monitor, showing a guard on patrol. Cut to outside the bunker where our hapless guard hears twigs crackling from the underbrush. He goes to check it out when HISS SNARL vamp attack.

Ketch, meanwhile, has turned up exactly one vampire. He sets into questioning her, chortling at her distress. Ketch's mode of interrogation mostly involves punching and yelling, which means that Dean FOR ONCE gets to play good cop. He pulls Ketch off of the girl and hunkers down in front of her. Dean wants information too, but he won't promise her freedom in exchange for information. Instead, he'll “make it quick.” She breaks at this offer and tells them that the other vampires are hunting the hunters back at Moonbase.

Serena zeroes in on Moonbase's security feed and notices that the hapless guard has disappeared. As they watch, the dead guard is hoisted into view of the cameras and then the Morris vampires head for the touchpad entrance at the gate. They use the guard's hand to open the exterior gate. (Suggestion for next time: simply rip the hand off for easier portaging. Why haul around a whole dead body when you can just put the part you need in a pocket?) (This practical monster tip is brought to you by Natasha and probably psychopaths everywhere.)

Sam orders lockdown (because he’s Sam Fucking Winchester and he’ll give the fucking orders around here) and Mary gets on the horn to warn everyone (in this case, red shirted security guards) to fall back into the safety of the compound. The vamps find a door into the compound, killing one of the escaping guards. Fortunately, Mary and Sam bust in and lop off a vamp head, knocking out the other. Sam locks down the door again, then stops Mary from killing the last vamp. It's interrogation time!

On the security feed the vampires spread out to surround the building. The captured vampire laughs at their distress and tells them that his father, the Alpha Vampire, has come to save them all. Serena scoffs at this. The Alpha's in Morocco according to the Brit’s latest intel. Sam sets them straight, though, and tells the room that he last met the Alpha in North Dakota.

The vamp starts villain laughing at the room so Mary chops off his head (squicking out Serena and Alton). They've got a big fight on their hands and the Moonbase isn't built to withstand a long defense. Mary heaves a long suffering sigh and takes stock of their weaponry, both human and hardware. “Who here has killed...anything?” she asks. To her dismay, only Sam and (EXASPERATED SIGH) Pierce have any experience at all.

“We gotta arm up,” Sam declares. “Weapons on the table.” Everyone dumps everything they have – a few knives, some rope, and small weaponry. Mary sets her bloody machete on the table, like a badass (but a tidy one).

Bigger weapons are in the armory, including the AVD. Mary wants to go get it; they can set it off in the vents and take out some of the scattered vamps, bug bomb style. Sam despairingly asks if they have anything stronger, because the Alpha will likely barely be dented by the AVD. Mary throws Mick a significant look: GET THE COLT, she mentally orders. Mick hauls out an equipment case and opens it up for Sam. The look on Sam's face, guys...

Sam carefully picks up the Colt, huffing an astonished (and emotional) breath. “Where did you get this?” he asks Mick.

“I stole it,” confesses Mary. “From Ramiel.” (Mary haters out there, I'm just saying she could have lied and Mick would have made something up to back up her lie. So. At least she's laying all of her cards on the table.) Mick bemoans the fact that the Colt doesn't work. They don't have any bullets for it. At this Sam Fucking Winchester pulls up a notepad and American Men of Letters the crap out of the situation, writing down the ingredients for a spell to make more bullets. “Got the recipe from my buddy.”

“Bobby Singer?” Mary asks. (FUCK YEAH, BOBBY. We miss you! We keep sending you letters in Heaven. WHY WON’T YOU WRITE US BACK? #HeavenIsAPrison)

Sam tasks the nerdly folks in the main compound with creating bullets for the gun. Meanwhile, all three hunters head for the armory to get the AVD. In order to get to the fuse box armory they've got to unlock the velociraptor vampire proof doors first and head out into enemy territory. Sam opens the door and immediately velociraptors vampires try to storm the compound. Sam vows to hold off the velociraptors vampires and sends Mary and Pierce off in the other direction to get the weaponry.

Mary grabs the AVD from the armory. In the center of the compound, Mick performs the spell over the bullets when he's interrupted by Pierce pounding on the door. Alton lets him in and then just hangs out in the open door when Pierce rushes inside. “What happened?” Mick demands.

“My swift and inevitable betrayal happened,” Pierce replies. Alton gets speared in the back by the quickly revealed Alpha Vampire himself. Pierce smiles stoogily at the Brits. Serena, bless her somewhat badass heart, rushes the Alpha vamp and gets gobbled for her trouble. Mick snatches up his newly minted bullets for the Colt and hides them away as the Alpha grins at him.

Meanwhile, Sam Fucking Winchester has just finished beheading his eleventieth vamp in the cramped hallways of Moonbase. He heads to the armory.

Back in the central office we learn that Pierce, though a hunter, has been bought off by the Alpha. “Alimony's a bitch,” Pierce explains. (Pierce. You're a hunter. Aren't you practically indigent anyway? I can’t believe you’re still trying to make a life in the legal circles of society.)

“I'm old,” complains the Alpha. “I like living quietly.” The BMoL have been a real pain in his fangs. He knew what they were up to in England but didn't interfere because, well, “it's England.” Ooooo sick burn, Alpha! America is his home (starts humming America the Beautiful) and it's time for the BMoL to Get. Off. His. Lawn. LOL.

In the armory Sam finds Mary passed out on the floor. Pierce had bashed her in the head just after she retrieved the weapon and then stomped on the AVD, crushing the weapon. (Psssh, Natasha scoffs. Way to cheap out on the casing, Brits. I’ll “fix” that detail for you in the fanfic.) Sam and Mary head back to the main center.

The Alpha, meanwhile, makes a super appealing offer to Mick. He'll call the headquarters in England, concede defeat, and then be devoured on the live feed. I mean, who wouldn't be on board with that plan? As the Alpha is cheerily performing his evil villain monologue, Mary and Sam creep in, machetes at the ready. Mary knocks down Pierce and Sam pulls out the Colt and points it at the Alpha.

“There are five creatures on this Earth that gun cannot kill,” scoffs the Alpha, “and I'm one of them.” Sam calls him on his bluff; the Colt is the only thing holding the Alpha at bay. Mick reveals his new bespelled bullets to Mary and they sidle ever closer to the Colt, and Sam.

Sam lays his own offer on the table. His family kills vamps that get out of line and for now, the Alpha has permitted their spotty attacks. Sam tells the Alpha to let him and Mary go and things will go back to the way they should be: “hunters and vampires, cops and robbers, a fair fight.” The Alpha can take Mick as a tasty to-go snack. Mick lunges in anger at Sam and they share a scuffle. Meanwhile Mary takes a swing at the Alpha. Sam lifts the Colt back up to the Alpha who chortles that the gun isn't loaded.

“You sure?” asks Sam Fucking Winchester.

We flash back. Sam notices Mick's bullets and significant blinks are shared. When Mick attacked Sam he shoved a bullet in his palm, Mary distracts the Alpha, Sam loaded said bullet, and....cut back to present. The Alpha realizes he's been played in a split instant, just before Sam cocks the weapon for firing.

BANG!

The Alpha drops in a haze of electric Colt-induced lightning flares.

Later, Mick stares down at his bloodied compound, the bodies of Serena and Alton littering the floor. Mary interrupts his brooding to tell them it's clear outside; all remaining vampires are either dead or have run off.

Cut to the garage where Dean and Ketch have at last arrived. Mick accuses Ketch of abandoning his post. “I don't know how it is in your ivory tower but down here in the muck, people die,” Ketch bites out, attractively. Ketch claims that he was out making a play for Dean, doing some nice killer bonding time (comparing weapons wink wink nudge nudge say no more), and simply following the BMoL handbook in his pursuit of the Winchesters. It's not his fault that Mick's compound fell apart. Then he drops the mic and walks off.

Meanwhile, the Winchesters confront each other.

Dean: So. Went out, back later, huh?

Sam: Just getting a drink, huh?

Mary: So lying is a thing in this family? Thank god, I fit right in.

Sam expresses surprise that Dean would “drive like a bat outta hell” to try to save the Moonbase when he hates the BMoL and didn't know Sam was there. Mary and Dean share a significant look.

“It's not your job to make my lunch, kiss me goodnight.” Dean says to Mary, breaking my fucking heart. ”We're adults,” he says shortly, and he's going to have to accept that Mary is going to make her own choices. Most importantly, Dean calls her Mom again. They've reached a temporary peace. (Natasha: It hurts but I’m also happy for them. This show!)

Pierce gets marched double time through the garage by Ketch. Ketch states that he's going to dispose of the renegade hunter in an unpleasant fashion. All three Winchesters are on board with this. (Which...yikes, dudes. I didn’t think you were up for cold blooded revenge killing. Sigh. I guess we really are in the darkest timeline.)

Mick wanders up and Sam heads over to him. Mick thanks him for his work and confesses that he messed up, he swings into full apology mode when Sam just drops: “I'm in. Look. Tonight was bad. But the Alpha vampire is dead. You're changing the world and I wanna be a part of it.” As for Dean? “Give me some time,” says Sam.

Natasha: Man, the BMoL make a strong case. Mutters to self: Just remember what they would do to Garth. Just remember what they would do to Garth. (And probably Cas.)

Boris: It's clear Sam and Dean don't need the BMoL. It's an interesting, and more than likely ill-conceived, choice for Sam right now to side with them, but things are going to get pretty heavy with Lucifer and the nephilim. Only TFW has handled Lucifer and a nephilim before. The BMoL are the props for our heroes. Things are going to get twisty, and we're going to be thankful that Sam's on the inside to blow the organization up. I’m reminded of Toni’s murder board --the Brits have no clue what they’re getting themselves into. I also hope that Mary course-corrects soon. And echoing Natasha: If the BMoL want to rid the planet of all supernatural creatures, where does that leave Cas? Garth? Kate? (And all those monsters similar to the once-living ones, like Lenore, Benny, and Amy) 

“Quotes,” they said, attractively:

Yeah, Mary, it is.

We don't just charge in, all John Wayne, guns a'blazing.

Places to be, vampires to behead.

We should move fast to keep the rats from fleeing the ship.

[survivorjordanpines]

Adam’s Jury Answers

Emma:

Sorry not sorry guys, I have to do this. Emma babe, this one's for you https://media.giphy.com/media/KIjiO0w6YHRew/giphy.gif

Ruthie, normally everyone loves goats, but only you could make keeping you at final tribal seem baaaaaaaaaaad

Ryan Teddy Palmer, the man with a position so secure in the game, he survived one alliance voting him out, only to be voted out next round by the one that was saving him!

Gage, didnt you know that when you're a pawn you actually need to get to the end of the board to be useful???

Raffy, maybe if you didn't take so many naps, you could have opened your eyes and seen the blindside coming!

Charlotte, you were so paranoid this game that when you wasted my extra vote and helped me rock out, I was convinced that playing bad was all just an elaborate ruse!

Chaos Casey, with how irrelevant you were before you were rocked out, you can be the next washup cast on Tumblr Survivor: Where are they now?

Regan, whenever you speak to me I always want to know more about you. Like, are you always this way?

And to top it all off!

Emma, thank god you were the closest thing to a uninmous vote we had this game. Otherwise we might have forgotten you played!

Casey:

Oh it's coming >:)

Regan:

Haha Regan I love you. You're so weird and quirky and I just dig it. Like I can only really translate half of this but I get the general idea.

Heart to heart, you were my original plan for a final 2. I got along really well with Charlotte and Kage too, but they got voted out while I was away and I got voted out while Charlotte was away so that didn't work out. You remember that right? Well point being after I came back and Jaiden was telling me about how he and Kage were using my name to throw lies out there, and I came right to you, I really thought we were squared away. And when you voted me out I just chalked it up to that being your plan all along, because they even said in the vote outs that you guys didn't want me to meet up with my friends on the other tribe. Jokes on you guys though because we live to vote eachother out. But anyway, when I came back in the game, if you had been on my tribe it probably wouldve been you i told about my idol. It just wasn't in the cards though, and I shacked up with Charlotte and Drew. I told you a lot of things, but I told a lot of people a lot of things. It was one big info trading roulette and no matter what the biggest scores I brought home to m main alliance.

So it didn't work out between us this time, but really I'm just a fireball in games. I kinda do whatever I want. I think I could've come into FTC a lot stronger if I had played by the book, but I get bored very easily. I don't want to do unfun things in the game because honestly getting to the end feeling like you did everything right and still losing is very disheartening. So maybe it was a little self-sabotage mixed with some impulsive things for laughs, but I can live with my decisions. I had a fun game and I made it to the end. If I can fuck shit up along the way then hey let's light this city on fire. Maybe next game we play together we can be wingmen and paint the town red. Until then keep doing what you're doing girl. And hey, if you feel like, who cares, just vote for Adam. After all, fuck it

P.S. I love that you called me Russell. I was actually going to pick him for my icon but usually in games people are sketched when you do that so I've since stopped and let Jordan pick my icon. But you see right through me ;)

Ryan:

Honestly, the most fun I have in these games is just hanging out over the period of the game! I've always gotten rather drained when it comes to prolonged social interactions, so having a group of friendly people just online hanging out all the time is really fun! It's a very no-pressure environment to just chime in and joke around with people and like, that's absolutely part of what made this season so great! If a tribe chat is dead or like it's just full of a few people dominating the conversation, it's no fun at all. But we did it right because no matter what kind of game drama was going on someone would be cracking jokes in our Jordan Pines chat. That's what games should be like. Cuz no matter what we're all just here to have a good time, so when people get too upset about these games it makes me sad. This stuff was created and put together by people like us so we could all enjoy Survivor, so just have fun with the game and be friends! You might even meet a fewpeople who are really worth it

Charlotte:

No worries Charlotte I love you too! I told you this when you visited me on Redemption but even after a few frustrating moves we made together I couldn't dislike you if I tried.

I am sorry about the rites of passage, doing things last minute has been an accidental pattern these few days cuz there's so much stuff to do back to back. I regret being so busy at work that I just wrote them on my phone whenever I had the chance, but I actually didn't intend to write much anyway. I'm sure it could've done with more polishing but I wanted to leave it lighthearted and leave the serious talk for tribal. I admittedly didn't know the custom was to write a paragraph for everyone and I guess brash quips were just more my style. I didn't mean to make it seem like I didn't care about this game.

But anyway, I doubt we'll talk much after this game but with any luck we'll see eachother in another game someday! I'll miss being inspired to see movies after hearing about all the ones you are going to. We had some good times in hats sweets, and games aside I'll always treasure genuine friendship interactions. It's been a pleasure spending time with you and if you ever wanna take a dip on the wild side again dont be afraid to help a hater out ;)

It's been fun hanging out all season Char Char <3

Ari:

I can see how me mostly just winning redemption challenges and being a dick could outshine my social achievements, but I'm glad you asked! From right when I got back into the game pre-merge, I immediately set myself up with two alliances. One Ryan invited me into, with his icon friends yourself and Emma, to have "majority" on the tribe, and my real alliance with Charlotte and Drew, whom I planned to go to the end with and shared my idol with. I also made friends with Gage and Raffy and even Jaiden who my alliance wasn't decided on voting out. At merge I met up with Jess, who I spent a lot of time with planning out island excursions so we could find all of the claws, and Regan who I stuck close to because I wasn't sure when she could be voted out. I also spent a lot of time trading info with Raffy and Gage, though I really only shared information that was useless or they couldve gotten from someone else. I continued to draw a lot of information from our horsehuman alliance, mainly information about claws and the isle because votes were obvious and it was just whether we wanted to go with majority or show our hand and vote someone else out. My alliance with Drew and Charlotte was constantly the deciding votes, and we only needed to reveal ourselves when suddenly we were being targeted.

Lastly with me talking with Raffy and Gage and them also talking to Drew/Charlotte seperately, we talked them both into making alliances and "bringing us together" (one alliance with Gage and one without) so that way we wouldn't have to seem connected but we still would get Raffy's vote for our own ends. Really my only mistake in alliances was you Ari. After voting out Ryan I was suspicious you would be talking to Jess and Ruthie about going against me, since I voted out your closest ally, yet still underestimated how likely you were to betray me when the chaos idol came out. Originally in my alliance with raffy gage charlotte and drew, each of us was going to vote for one person, but I wanted to do duos with gage/raffy and charlotte/drew so i could say i was voting for you. In reality I meant to betray you so you would be rocked out alone while me drew and charlotte voted in a threeway. However, in the final hour of tribal me and charlotte got into an argument and at the last moment i agreed to just self vote and charlotte would jsut vote drew, which she didn't even end up doing! So our alliance crumbled because when we should have just all 3 voted eachother charlotte got 3 votes and me and drew went to rocks. And the rest is history.

So I knew you could have been colluding with Jess and Ruthie but honestly didn't think you had the moxie. Well played

Rafael:

That's okay Raffy. I guess if all you have to do to win survivor is win immunities then do your thing. I'm more of a showman and I strive to make the game something great. And it totally was! This is probably the best org I've ever played, for so many reasons.

I want to remind you that I once told you I live to entertain. So I ask you, https://info.umkc.edu/unews/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/oS3Qd2AZZ-620x396.png

But I hope you know I had such a fun time talking with you! I wish we had gotten deeper into a videogame discussion because I think we overlap in more areas than one, but I always loved having you around! Too bad everyone else would have loved you too and there's really only room for one Jordan hate up here. But hey, no reason to let that keep you from rooting for the home team ;)

Gage:

I'd vote for Jess. See: http://survivorjordanpines.tumblr.com/post/170099908090/jessicas-opening-speech

Ruthie:

Thanks Ruthie! You know me and you never really played the game together but it was always really pleasant to just pop in on each other! I felt like we were old friends catching up for tea while the world raged on. I enjoyed what little time we spent together <3